Monday, May 01, 2006

"KISS"na mana hai

“To all those love birds, kissing in public has just gotten 10 times more expensive in India's capital”

This is what an article in rediff says. The moral police have struck. Yesterday Chennai and today the capital of India.Its just a matter of time before the entire country gets a moral boost.They say kissing in public is an offence. What prompted the increase in the fine? The story is something like this.

Note:: Through out the post we will use the word “activity” for “kissing”.( God I am so shy to even type the word kiss so many times and how do these Casanovas manage to actually indulge in the activity in the public. I got to take some lessons from them)


The day before yesterday :

People indulged in the activity secretively. They made sure no one knew about their activity.

Yesterday :

India started shining ( read “westernizing”). People have become bold enough to come out into the public and do the activity in a fit to mimic the westerners. In a way if not the country at least the citizens were “developing”. The authorities could not stomach this. They some how wanted to curb this development (which they have been successfully doing for the past 5 and a half decades). So they came up with this plan of imposing a fine of Rs 50 on the hapless couples who indulged in the activity in public places because they could not do the same at their homes owing to India’s rich and varied heritage (as it is said in the pledge). Thus the authorities were successful, to some extent, to remind the youth of India’s culture which is getting tarnished just because some couples indulge in the activity in the public. Recently Mallika Sherawat* joined the authorities in salvaging the Indian culture. Wondering how? She became a celebrated part of the tinsel town by “Murdering” the so called Indian culture that these authorities have been tying to preserve. She was lucky enough to escape the fine of Rs 50 for indulging in the activity in public I thought.

“She did not do the activity in public she just did that in the sets of the movie. That is not a public place. It so happened that it was screened in the public” was the explanation the authorities gave when asked why they let go Mallika “murder” Sherawat.

Today :

Thanks to the fat salaries youngsters are drawing today Rs 50 has become a paltry sum for them. So they don’t mind stealing a kiss (sorry for using “the word”. I could’nt use “activity” here) from their partner. They are thinking

“Lets do it. Its well and good if we don’t get caught otherwise we will pay just Rs 50”

It did not take much time for the authorities to realize that the youth has this kind of an attitude. So again in a fit to suppress this development they increased the fine from Rs 50 to Rs 500. Yes , as you might have guessed they were again successful, to some extent. Yesterday she epitomized the Indian culture at home ( in India) but now Mallika Sherawat* has taken upon herself the onus of “exposing” the Indian culture on the global stage by acting in a foreign movie. Hail mallika who is preserving the Indian culture and damn these love birds who are tarnishing it by doing the activity in public places, behind the bushes so that no one can catch them red-handed. I say they are all stupid. Why do the activity , get caught and then pay fine? Just join the movies and then therz no stopping you. You can do anything you want without being fined. I say even the moral police are not far behind. They are extremely clever. They just stand behind the love-struck couple, watch the entire activity and then they prowl on the couple to collect the fine. I feel their job is pretty cool . You get paid to watch the activity “Live”.

Tomorrow :

The moral police go a step further. They don’t even allow a married couple to indulge in the activity. So all the men ( who have only one reason to get married ;) ) see no point in getting married if they cannot even do the activity with their wife. So all men decide to remain unmarried. Well, wait a minute. Now in understand the ulterior motive of the authorities in doing all this. No marriages , no kids. Voila, superb way to control the ever exploding Indian population. Hail the authorities.



*Apologies for disappointing all the guys with the kind of images i put up.I know you must have expected some "normal" images of mallika but i did not want this blog to be rated as 18+

9 comments:

Reetesh Mukul said...

Moral Police ... Huuh ... What will occur when this tag "Moral" will get diluted once so called "immoral" activities get sudden end. Moral police is here because of these things do happen in society, and they will never get stopped. You have rightly quoted that Rs.50 is too small!

prathyu said...

goshhhh..moral values???, just 50 rs or 500, whtever ..was this rule really implemented, I didn't know tht,n wait no need to worry when ppl like mallika(pride of India) r gonna make it Internationally, :)...

nice post, lolllllllllll

Sidhu said...

not just reciprocating, I'm learning a lot from your blog...
thanks for dropping by

Anonymous said...

why ru specific about mallika .every actress is like that...infact the stories are like that and as far as the issue is concerned definitely the move is a welcome one.because of such things there is atleast some indianess "bachi hey now also".i feel these small things are starting points for corrosion of indian culture.if we allow such things...one day will come when nothing "indian " is left.yes read srila prabhpada book on lord krishna which says open show of love
is "rakshasa" gunam which clearly means its not indian.ha i proved it

N!kh!l said...

@mukul

Rightly said mukul. Such activities will never get to an end.

@prathyu

I think it is being immplemented in reality otherwise how do u think the poor "moral police" will feed their "families" (pun intended).

@sidhu

what did u learn from my blog? That to kiss in public u have to be a movie star? just kidding.

@anonymous

I too agree with "Lord Krishna" ( do i really have a choice?) that public display of love is "raakshasa gunam" (demon like).My point is why are people resorting to public displays of affection. Thats because they see their so called role models do the same on-screen.In india , thanks to the firm roots of corruption, i think monetary punishments will never work.
I agree that most of the actresses today are not far from mallika. I just wanted to take a name to reinforce my statement rather than just using the word "heroines".
Mr Anon u have made such a nice point. Why r u afraid to reveal your identity then?

Thanks everyone for visiting.

Cinderella said...

Nice Mallika review and kissology out here....lmaof..!!
Keep the stories up..

Anonymous said...

it appears u are very critical of heroines.but poor people what will they do.they do what the director and producers demand .everything in this world is money related.they act for money.

as some anonymous commented ,openness for indians is needed in trade and not in such things

and my one more argument is that why should we ape west in all these .we buy their goods,their idealogies,their culture and what not.why not we take good from them(like punctuality...)and be ourselves

Anonymous said...

it appears u are very critical of heroines.but poor people what will they do.they do what the director and producers demand .everything in this world is money related.they act for money.

as some anonymous commented ,openness for indians is needed in trade and not in such things

and my one more argument is that why should we ape west in all these .we buy their goods,their idealogies,their culture and what not.why not we take good from them(like punctuality...)and be ourselves

N!kh!l said...

@krishnamachari
I am not as critical of the heroines as u think i am. But yes i dont like the idea that common man is punished for kissing in public but these so called celebs are let go.Why this disparity? Just because they act n movies does not make them superior to anyone.Acting is just another profession like the many others.So i just feel they should be treated like the comman man is treated.

Thanx for dropping by.