Adieu

“C’mon , its your last exam. Don’t screw it up.” said his mind

“Screw the exam. U will never get a chance to see or talk to her again.” said his heart.

Only rarely did Arun’s heart and mind agree on something. In all such battles his heart always triumphed. That day was no different. “Screw the exam“ he thought as he closed his book and went in search of her.

He hustled through the busy college corridors. There was not a single classroom that he did not run into in order to find her. That day lady luck did not accompany him. As a last resort he ran to the college play ground to see if she was in any of the college buses parked there. He stood in the middle of the ground, in the scorching heat, thinking of all that he wanted to say to her when he would meet her for the last time in his life. The fact that he was still not able to locate her and that there was not much time left for the start of the exam robbed him of his hope. In that moment of despair the only thing he could possibly think of was to get back to his book and run his thumbs through it to ensure that he did not flunk the last exam of his college life.

Finally he entered the examination hall only to be shocked by her presence. He then went and sat in his chair 2 seats to her right. The examination hall was buzzing with the voices of the other students. Some praying, some trying desperately to remember that all-important formula, some busy checking their stationery, some still flipping the pages of their books. Amidst all this he was silent. He sat in his chair oriented towards his left so that he could get a clear view of her. He just sat there admiring her. He liked everything about her, every word she said, every move she made. Every time she smiled, he felt a tickle in his heart, which was smug from its recent triumph over his mind.

Just when he was busy in his own world he noticed her walk towards him. He quickly turned and started to pretend to be checking his stationery. He felt neglected when she just walked past him to meet the guy sitting next to him. She handed over her slam book to that guy, as that was the last day of college. She asked that guy to pass it around so that the others could fill it up. The slam book exchanged hands and toured all around him but never came to him. Just then the bell rang to mark the start of the exam. He felt happy that he had his exam to worry about than to sit and brood over the recent incident. Throughout the duration of the exam he stole some time to glance at her.

He finished his exam well before the stipulated time. He had to go to a far off city because he secured a job there while he was in his final semester. Despite the fact that he had a bus to catch he waited for her to finish the exam so that he could talk to her for one last time and tell her how he felt about her. As was her habit she did not cease to scribble on her answer book until the invigilator snatched it away. But it was already late. He had to leave.

Arun Bhattacharya, with tears in his eyes, left. On the last day of college he did not get a chance to say “ I LOVE YOU” to the girl he not just loved but worshiped.

P.S. May 4th 2004 was the last day of our college. This post is in remembrance of that day.